Today is a national holiday....celebrate

It's National Smelly Exhaust Pipe Day....party people and get your fucking exhaust fixed because they smell like shitcakes.

And on a more important note:

As I was driving over the bridge today I noticed that the river was really high. And I wondered to myself as I often do:

"Paul do you think if you swan dive off of the bridge into the river that you would make a splash or die?"

I like to think of myself as glamourous and have a tiny splash. However, reality has set in and I think I'd create a world of havoc with the tidal wave I would make and then die.

And I've come up with a new vaccuum. The Hoover Havoc.

Slogan: Don't fuck with the Hoover Havoc....it will suck you dry.

I think the censors would like that. My ideas are amazing and since my first language is "fuckmerunningyoudicksuckingtwatlickingsonofabitchinwhoreslutrag," I think I'd get rave reviews.

Anyway, I'm in la la land. You know what that means...

And if you don't I'm pretty sure you can figure it out if you read back through my journal.