Does your Tuna Taco need Sour Cream?

Conversation brought to you by Cheri, Missy, and Paul:

Paul(me): Vagina's are weird. I mean manhood is a different story. You can put whipped cream and cherries all over it.
Cheri: Why can't you put whipped cream on a vagina?
Missy: And the boobs?
Paul: Well if you put whipped cream on a vagina it just reminds me of a really bad yeast infection. And I have a rack of my own so why would I want to mess with someone else's?
Cheri: You know you like to decorate. Think of it as an art project.

Why is it that I am always talking about vagina's at work. Well I mean I was text messaging at work so it sort of is at work. But I did use the word "Roast Beef Curtains" in a sentence today. I think that is the worst slang for vagina. Eww. But like I said before vagina's are weird and when you draw the whole reproductive system you wind up with a moose head.

If I were a toad today I would be horny. What is up with my sex drive these days. I have one good dream and I do mean good about Michael and now I'm like okay I'm ready when you are. That is why Satan invented porn. For my viewing pleasure. Actually porn makes me laugh. However, it has to be noted that some porn is quite a turn on. When you find one with the "model/eye candy" stars. Ripplings abs, perfect teeth, no tan lines.

I don't own any porn. I mean I have had magazines but they are at April's in my stash because Lord forbid I have it in the house. Plus gay porno magazine in house=no need to come out to daddy. So the question is posed:

How many of you own pornographic material? (I sort of own it but it is at another location)