Minnie.......Minnie Ripperton

Do you know who this is? Probably not...unless you know me. This is the hooch who sung...."Loving You...is easy cuz you're beautiful." I can't get the fuckin song out of my head and I haven't played it since last weekend for my aunt and to torture my father. He really hates this song...when I bought Minnie Ripperton's greatest hits I made sure that it was the first to hit the cd player on the way back from Best Buy....my father was in the car and I blared the song....he yelled at me and told me that it needed to be turned down or off because I shattered his ear drums(<-----is ear drum one word or two?). I hope this isn't the song I'm thinking of when I go to surgery could you imagine what that dream would be like when you go under? Flower, bunnies, rainbows, an earth shattering high pitched diva breaking bottles, windows, and champagne glasses spontaneously throughout the dream. Ugh. I want to go under thinking of like "I see booty" or "Back that thing up." That way I can be at the club with my friends in the dream. But on second thought if I hear something like that and I'm all dreaming of what they say it could lead to arousal on the operation table. That is like the worst possible thing that could happen. But I'd never know unless the nurse showed up in my room after surgery for some "Sexual Healin." Today is like the add song titles to every sentence because it makes them seem more "Bootylicious." You see what I mean...."A'ight"(<----the thing they yell in the Macarena).

What I have to say...

So I'm driving and I like what if something happens during the surgery and I never get to see my friends and families faces again? Well for those of you who read this I want to send some little shout outs and you can pass them along if you want just so people know that I do think of them.

April

The song title that comes to mind for you is "You are my sunshine." Don't even ask. You make me laugh more than anyone else has ever done or ever will do. Our little Lucy and Desi spats (which are all fun) seem to be getting more intense everyday but damn most of the stupid shit we say to each other could be put on Tee shirts and you know this. You make me happy. You make me laugh. You make me love to have someone around even when I don't want them to be there. You are my sunshine...especially when I'm depressed but you some how bring me through the rain. We never say this to each other but maybe in the "Be careful getting home" everynight but do know that I truly love you being my friend.

Amanda

Turn your desks to face the person sitting next to you. This is your new buddy. That is always what comes to mind when I think of you. That first day in Phillips class. Who would have known that he would have made two totally similar personalities bond that day and now five years down the road they are still bonded. You, Amanda are my twin...since we are both Gemini's. I think that we have found each other while most other Gemini's spend forever searching for that balance to their personality. We compliment each other with stupidities and sarcasm. You too make me laugh the living hell out of myself. Whether it me Product Patrol or Carcus Control we are always ready to have a good time. I'm really proud of you dealing with school and now having a baby!! I'm really excited because I get to see this baby from the get go. Loves Ya!

Constance and Sarah

While we aren't even as close as we used to be I do truly miss you both. I know that you are doing well. Desi told me that you are both doing really well and I'm so glad to hear that. And for all the times that I didn't say it Constance I do miss you. I know that it doesn't do much justice now but hey at least you know. Constance you are too cute...the thing I love about you is the way you love to take care of people. No matter what they, I mean I did to you. I could have stabbed you and damnit you would still be there for me....you truly are blessed with the notion of nurturing. Sarah, girl you are so much crazier than I thought. You bring out the bad side of me...the sexual side. And for that, I'm really glad because I don't get to see it that often. You make people relax and have a good time and just chill..!!! I love you both like my little sisters and you know this!!

Desi

Even though you told me not to write about you anymore in my journal wether good or bad I going to break the rule this time. The song that I think of when I think of you is "At Last." I know this is your wedding song....well I'd love to be the one on the other side of your arms when you dance to this. Hint...hint. I know you probably know that I have feelings for you that you cannot return because you aren't into me like that but, it's still nice to know that I have you as a friend. You are so beautiful to me. I don't know why. To this day the first time I saw you I know my heart skipped a beat...and how long ago was this...when I worked at AB&C before I got fired the first time. You make me laugh, work hard, enjoy work, mad, sometimes sad...but it doesn't matter because your friendship is well worth it and I know that half the time it's not me it's just frustration. Don't let people hold you back because you are an asset to this world even though others are trying to discourage you. Much love to you from the very core of my guarded heart.

Susan

"Keep your nose clean." That should be a song because that is what you do for me and I so appreciate it. You keep me in line and have faith in me no matter what I do. You always tell me that I can do it. Unless it's something that wouldn't keep my nose clean. You are wonderful. Probably one of the few people who know me better than my family. You are CRAZY...but in a good way. You make work so much fun for us! You don't even know. I love you just like a big sister who is watching out for her little brother. "Oh my god Paul take me to your house and fix my hair. What the fuck did she do to me?" That was one of the funniest things ever! You know what I'm taking about! It's something that I think of all the time about you...what a big step that was! At least you have something from me that you will have forever...the tat! "Love Ya Babe"(<-----one of your favorite things to say to me on the phone...back at ya).

Samantha

I feel like we are in the movie "Clash of the Titans" most of the time. Lord do we butt heads. But it's so funny how none of that matters at the end of the day. And we just go back to joking around. You make my blood pressure boil girl! But it's so worth it...who else would I argue with and then turn around and shoot a rubberband at! I mean come on. The thing that I enjoy about you is that you have stories upon stories and it's almost like damn this girl needs to write a book just about her mother. Your stories are hilarious and you keep me laughing. It's been almost three years of laughter. Keep them stories comin' girl!

Ms. Pat

"The only rule is...is that you can't say fish!!" Damnit...I was the one frying the shit! So I should have been given another chance. You know? Woman you are my grandmother that I lease out to other families. You have made me laugh to I've almost pissed myself...remember the time I even choked and had to leave the call center because I was laughing so hard that I almost passed out in the hallway! "He had his legs removed from the knees up!" You give me so much support and tell me to basically say "Fuck it" when things go shitty. Lord what I wouldn't give to have known you in your 20's! We would have made some crazy music around town! I love ya Ms. Pat like you were my very own Grandmother!!

Tricia

I owe this blog to you. I never really show much emotion when it comes to not being funny. You introduced me to blog! and I am so greatful. Without it I don't know what I would do. You are so quirky, hilarious, and relaxed. You remind me of my Aunt Ganda! And that does say something because not many people live up to her personality. Remember this..."Oh my god she had the worst headache of ever so I was all like I'm ACD Coordinator on the weekends...I let her go home." What fun was that one! I felt like it came out of a Lucy and Desi show! Plot well and everything will be okay said the wise grass hopper!!

Angel

Maybe one day we will be rich off of the fat bank idea! Who knows? You are my Rice Patty Yellow Spice Girl from C Town! I am telling you what sometimes you make me want to have an ethnic change surgery and become Asian! I know that sounds stupid but you make me crack the fuck up with "Lil Chinese Asian Girl..." starting out most of our conversations. Even though you have been stressed out beyond belief you still keep a positive outlook on things and I think that I'm slowly but surely starting to adapt that part of your character into my own. And for that I thank you.

Laura

If there had to be a song for you make a guess what what it would be? (<---"make a guess what" is a shout out to April's late Uncle Gene.) BOOTYLICIOUS! or BACK THAT THANG UP! Girl where in the hell did you get Jennifer Lopez's gene's from? Let me know. Again I have to say that we have butted heads many many many times but in the end it's all over an done with and I got to see a side of you (not your backside) at Janetta's party that night at the track the made me realize you aren't the "evil supervisor" but a fun loving person that I truly adore.

Mom and Dad

Even though I know you don't read this I still have to include you. I mean you did bring me into this world by emaculate conception! Even though I see like a bad ass, temper driven person most of the time I do love you both more than life itself. I'm just fickle when it comes to my temper. If changes from minute to minute. To Mom: You are so so strong. You have been through hell and back but there is still happiness in your voice. Not many people can say that they have a mother that is as strong as you but I do. To Dad: Remember, I do love you!! I know that you want to hear that more often and it always seems like..."he doesn't love me." But I do! I'm just that type of person who can't show "love." I'm better at showing friendship and stupidity. Never think that I don't love you because that is utter bullshit!(<----he is going to yell or kill me for cussing...even though it's typed and not vocalized).

Granny

You will never ever know how much you mean to me. You are my world. The only person that I cry for when writing about. I have so much love for you that it sometimes makes me just dread ever to know that one day you won't be here anymore. I know people say that "they are off in a better place." But for me your better place is here...wether in Baltimore or Harpers Ferry. You above all people I know have been through so much in one lifetime that most people would have never made it. But you held on and I have you. I wish I could keep you forever even though I know that you will watch over me no matter where you are. I love knowing that when I come to your house that there is always a story to be told or some hell to raise! It makes you one of the funniest people that I know. You show me so much love in the little things that you say and do for me when I come to visit that it is enough love to last me the rest of my life. I love you Granny.

Pop Pop

"GD...son of a bitchin..bastard ass shit!" If you have never met my Grandfather this is what primarily is his vocabulary. He is such a Grumpy old man! I think that movie was made after him. The thing I love about you is that you don't give a damn! You remind me of Rhett Butler...."Frankly my dear I don't give a damn." You are set in your ways and that is that...there is nothing that will ever change that. But more so I respect you because you finally learned that some of the things you do hurt me and when I come around now you are more about having a good time and just talking...not pushing your opinions on me. I love you for that!

To every other friend and Family member because my hands are getting tired and this blog is way too long and I've got to go

You all make me who I am. Wether some of you see that as a bad person or a wonderful person it doesn't matter. My whole being is made up of little snipets of your personalities. I look for them. Always look for who I've become to mimic. I am who I am not only because of my own personal thoughts and ideals but because I've been influenced by some of the craziest, backstabbing, loving, caring, hilarious, and unforgettable people in the world. I personally don't think that many people realize what debt is owed to those around them. The debt is life...they are what keeps you going. They are what makes you the person you turn out to be...not fully but they inspire you subconsciously. They are what some take for granted or what some choose to abuse. But for me they (friends and family) and what keep my world afloat.

So I know this is all heart felt and shit but I don't care. I'm glad that I have the opportunity to leave my mark for the moment on the internet. It will always be here for those I cherish! So this blog is just to let you all know how much I really care for you incase something should ever happen to me. Wether in surgery or thiry years down the road....it is here!

With much love from the one above....

Paul

P.S. And for those of you who would have thought I would have left Aaliyah out! Don't even go there! She is my artistic influence and the voice that makes me know my angel was once on earth but watching over all of us in Heaven. One love baby girl!!