Wine me, dine me, and then pay for the bill.

Please don't think I'm that lame to say "69 me." But I just did so fuck you. Anyway I came home and my fucking favorite number 69 was the amount of unread messages I had in my email. I do and always feel special. Thank you.

At work I thought I was going to have a fucking nervous breakdown. Not that there was anything to be nervous about. I was extremely bored. Okay people I took paper clips and post-it notes and made action figures. Pictures will follow. More importantly I wore women's sunglasses and tons of curly glittery ribbon in my hair as I wanted to have long hair today.



Hence the picture.

This morning I talked about having sex with twins guys. How hot is that. Just because it was me saying that hot gay sex with Paul and his brother would be interesting doesn't mean I'm a whore. Hello I've only slept with one guy in 23 years. Granted I slept with him from 12 until 19 but one. I really need to get out more. And what is it with me and asian men these days. I think Cheri got me started and now I'm finding that asian men are overlooked.

ASIAN MEN ARE FUCKING HOT!!

Cheri has always told me that once "You go asian you don't go caucasian." I'm thinking that is true.

I managed to use the word "fuck" quite frequently today. Usually I try to not use it at work. And what you just read is a total fucking lie. But if I had to guesstimate how many times it was used I'd have to say about 150 or more. Yeah I have a really bad potty mouth. Anyone who knows me that the word "what" is usually followed by "the fuck."

Like the first word that came out of my mouth this morning was...let me see...hmmm...FUCK. It could be because I tripped over some big canister that was in the floor and twisted my goddamned ankle. None the less I knew it was going to be a wonderful day. So far I haven't found the wonder. But I am full on pasta.

Time to go. Walking again with my mother who has decided she is the next Richard Simmons. Trying to motivate me and shit to walk. What the fuck? She is so paying my $172 cellphone bill.

P.S. She called today to tell me she was so it's not like I'm giving her an order to do it. Spoiled brat...nonetheless.