To Trust or Not to Trust

I was on the phone with Cheri tonight. I say "on the phone with Cheri" like it is a surprise. However, we started talking about the issue of trust and the principles of trust. She talked about how she gives so much trust to people as a relationship/friendship develops until they have her full trust. She said that in order to really live you have to give your trust to people.

I on the other hand trust no one. I never have. I never will. Cheri said that this made her feel sad for me. Sad, because I could never really live until I have given away my trust fully to someone. She asked if I trusted her. And my response is "no." I told her that she does not need to take it personal because I again, trust no one. Not my family, parents, friends and especially not enemies or strangers. Cheri wondered where all this came from. The fact that I have trained myself to never trust anyone. She wondered how it is that I can tell people things that I don't want to "get out" if there is no trust there. I tell people things but when I do I always expect them to be passed on. I always have. If the person I am telling doesn't repeat it fine but I always expect it to go to at least one other person.

Now, I am questioning if what she said is true. Do I need to give my full trust to someone in order to actually have lived? Or can I continue on never trusting anyone?

I know this will probably come as a surprise to most that I don't trust you. But, it is something that you will have to deal with. Because unlike most people I don't expect trust in return. I trust no one and I expect no one to trust me. Not saying that I get all gabby and spread everyone's business because I don't. If you ask me to keep it to myself I will. I always have and will continue to do so. I don't run and tell anymore...like when I was younger. I have learned that it is best to keep things to yourself when someone gives you information and I have stuck to it.

Then, I wonder if people around me actually give their trust away? Or do they just say that they do? We are all posers in some aspect of our lives. When it comes to trust though I don't fake it because I never give it.

Now don't get me wrong if you were hanging on a cliff and I knew I could heave you up to save your life and you didn't believe me if I say "Trust me on this" that is a different situation. You never have my emotional trust. Just the trust that I won't let you die when I grab your hand. I'm not down for letting my friends and family die. But, this phrase is a loose sense of trust.

Anywho, I just got to thinking about trust and needed to write a little. I have a job interview on Wednesday for a skip tracer position for credit card fraud and on November 12th an interview with the government.

And trust me I will find your ass if you have bad credit or credit fraud...LOL.

And I give you two new pictures...

The first is the pumpkin I carved. It is supposed to be a vampire but looks more like Satan. The second is the alien slime picture. Mel seems to think I was covered in slime when it was actually water.