The Problem At Hand

I do not mind working. Honestly, I don't. Well I am almost sure I don't mind it. But, I do find that there are certain tasks that I do not enjoy. Showing up on time is one of them. I am working on that now. I was two whole minutes early to work today. And yes I do plan to note that on my timesheet. The biggest chore for me would be filing. I hate it. I think that the world would be a better place if it just stopped filing. Who cares if you don't have a copy of a purchase order from 1879? I mean I couldn't give a damn and the company I work for shouldn't either. I mean how many instances are there when you really need a copy of something to evade the IRS or that hooker that you banged in your 1979 Pinto and decided to sue for child support for the precious gift she birthed...Little Ray Ray? Exactly. It only happens once in a lifetime. So you see my point. At least you better because this rant does not have options. And it doesn't welcome any opposing opinions so keep them filed away in your mouth. Each day I have filing to do and I have not done it since Friday. So that is tree days of filing I have managed to save for a rainy day. Would it be a bad thing if it fell in my trash can and got escorted to our local landfill? Would I feel guilty? Would the filing trollwhores that I work with suspect my involvement?

And the answers to these burning questions are as follows:

Question 1: Our landfills are getting overwhelmed so I will just burn them.

Question 2: No. Not feelin an ounce of guilt.

Question 3: There is a chance but these ghastly beings rarely come out of their caves. And if I threw them a Snawsauge they would be fooled.

So, it comes down to the age old question: What outfit will go with my file burning extravaganza?