Man I just mess up everything

I've done as you have asked. And by you I know this person will know who the "you" is. I just want to say that I didn't mean anything by the comments that I made on the website. If anything it was stupid of me and I want you to know that I would never ever do anything in that respect. I really do value our friendship. You are the first male friend that I have had in forever who has accepted me for who I am and not wanted to change me. I couldn't believe that you were able to read the comments especially since I erased them a long time ago. April knows that I erased them so I'm guessing that the page was saved to your computer. I really can't tell you how sorry I am for hurting you this way. Please know that I would never act upon what I had mentioned in the blog that day. It was just me expressing myself which I should have kept to myself. I never expected you to read it or for the other person to read it. I deserve whatever you have to say to me I know this I just hope that we can still be friends because I really really do enjoy having you as a friend. I cannot stress enough how much of an idiot bastard I was for writing that about him. It wasn't right to say that about him and I honestly didn't think it would upset you that much. From the bottom of my heart I am truly sorry and if there is anything that I can do please don't hesitate to let me know you have my cell number. I cried all day long when I thought of losing your friendship because of how stupid I let myself be. I would never act upon what I said and I can't stress this enough either...please believe me when I say this. You have done so much for my self-esteem and overall happiness that I can't believe I was so stupid. I love you like a brother and that is really no lie. I talk about you all the time because I enjoy you that much. I even think about you and how you are doing and what I can do like when I stopped by to tell you about the Brittany video to better our friendship. Ugh. Umm...so just please know that I fully understand you being mad right now because you have every right to be but when I did write that I really didn't know you two all that well and I would take it back in a split second. I have really moved on from that it was more like a I have to write about it to get it out of my system. And please don't think that I come by to see the other person because I come by to see you. You are one of the greatest people I have ever met in my life...seriously. Actually, I don't even think about stopping to see that person because I tell April all the time when can we go see "you" I need so see "you." So if you read this please let me know that there is some type of hope that we can mend things and if there is anything I can do to make this up to you please please let me know because I am truly truly crazed right now at losing your friendship.

I want you to know that I love ya even if you decide we cannot be friends any longer and I'll always be around if you ever need me and I say this with the very core of my heart.

I am so sorry.