Merry Kissmyassahcanyoukah

I know that I am, oh let's say, 99% responsible for having to go out in the madness I call the department store yesterday, but, that 1% is the world's fault. For once couldn't it just revolve around me? Just for the twenty minutes it would have taken to make a few small purchases. But, throughout it all I only managed to yell at one person, telling them to kiss my ass. As you must at least do this once a holiday season. I think it is written somewhere in the bible next to the white after labor day rule. But, I will have to check on that.

The look on people's faces when you tell them to kiss your ass is wonderful. It is like a scared, shocked, and appalled look. Sort of like if you were having sex with some really unattractive fat bald guy then found yourself enjoying it but, then you looked at him again kind of look. All this over a parking space that you may say I might have taken from someone. But, hey at this time of year it is a given that the parking lot is a battlefield and you do what you do to survive. Yep, check that next to the kiss my ass clause which is next to the labor day rule.

So, I am done with shopping and I am glad of that. "Glad of that," hot damn I sound like Pollyanna. I did however, get one of my Christmas gifts early. The new video iPod that holds up to 15,000 songs. See what happens when you have been a good boy all year. You get good presents. LOL!!

Merry Christmas and please Kissmyassahcanyoukah if you will.

Bosom Buddies

When I was away at rehab I just happened to make several friends. Now I was told by many of the staff there that this was not a place to make friends but, seriously, who can you depend on when you are in this situation and even more who can you relate to. Yeah, I get the whole birds of a feather stick together. However, that does not mean that their actions will have me strung out if they should happen to slip up. I have slipped up one time since then and I paid for it. My mother found out. But, since then I have done nothing.

So my friends Kelly and Travis will be moving in with my parents and I until they can get on their feet. Since they have left they have been clean but have been hit with many cases of bad luck. Their car getting totaled, Kelly's mother not paying their rent while they were in rehab (little side note, Kelly gave her mother the rent money), and just not being able to make it financially. So I say to hell with the preconceived notion that former junkies cannot be friends. I think it is all a mind game.

So within the next two weeks I will have a full grown sister and brother who just happen to be boyfriend and girlfriend living with me. Yeah they really aren't sister and brother but I thought it was funny. After all I do reside in West Virginia so why not make jokes.