So I am totally on a roll! Here we go with an ode to someone else:

Ode To Tricia

You have an address that is named wee wee dog
Could you cut a heart out of fog?
You like to laugh oh yes you do
Don't piss on the bedsheets that's a boo boo.
You like Baby G she is the bomb
I'll make her a website at ratalley.com
You are a rocktress oh yes you are
Come on girl fuck work lets hit the bar.
You have a really nifty tattoo on your back
Watch out when aliens attack.
You tried to decorate your cpu as a cow
Here comes systems watch out now!
You have a really funny laugh
Pew...give beef jerky a bath!
You have been quite a good lead
You deserve a noble steed.
One plus two plus three plus four
You're leaving with me out the front door!

Tah-dah again!

Paul

So I am back and with avengence! So Tricia tells me that I have this unique style of writing so I want to write a poem or a story for you now. How about an improv poem...here we go!!!

Ode to Me

I am so wonderful it's scary
I am missing my lip the moustache is too hairy

Angel, Constance, and Sarah make fun of my lip
They need to stay away from the roach clip(just kidding)

I am too spectacular for the earth
So people want to view my girth (gee wonder who?)

Truth or Dare is the question of the day
Come on Friday I need some pay

I am white and six foot tall
I love to go shopping at the mall

I love myself oh yes I do
Come one over and love me too

I am a rock star not a lot of people know
If my hair grows out I have an afro

I have not butt it is missing
I can stand or sit when pissing (that is an overshare)

I have five tattoos all over my body
Wink wink to Laura you are a hottie

Aaliyah is my favorite singer
Sometimes I think I need to go on Jerry Springer

I have hazel slash green eyes
I love to eat Ruby's cheese fries

My hair is black with a little red
I would love to be in bed

I consider myself kind of chunky
Do you remember that girl named Punky?

I love to watch movies all the time
I am so good and know how to rhyme

I am the bomb I don't know how to explain
Don't pin it on me I'm not the one to blame

Two Two and Three and I'll add the four
I leaving now out the front door!

Tah Dah

Paul

She looks like one of those rap guy's girlfriends! Wink Wink!! So It has been like eleven days since I last wrote in my journal. I have been oodles of noodles busy. I have had so much stuff due for college and work has been a big ol' bitch! Shout out to someone in 5..4...3..2...1--> Cutter you evil whore I'm gonna kick your ass...shut up hag! Ha..ha..ha! I am like the greatest person I know. So I have a paper due in Professor B's class this upcoming week on Tuesday and man I don't want to have to do it. I want to know some real "class paper" genie to say yes Paul I realize you don't feel like writing a long boring ass paper so shabam poof alacazam with some spam here's your paper! An A- just so it doesn't look suspicious. But that will never happen or maybe it will. Who knows? Do you? Huh? Do you? Don't withhold information leading to the whereabouts of the "class paper" genie I will kick yo' big ol' chunky ass! It's turkey lurkey day and it is like as boring as hell! Actually do you think that hell could be borning or do you think that hell could be an amusement park filled with lots of fun rides to go on...but they are all on fire and the object of the ferris wheel is to make it around once and not get burned? Hold on a sec I have to call Satan we are close, personal friends! Just kidding. He told me to tell you that! I am crrazzy! Aaliyah's new album comes out on December 10th...gee wonder if I'll get it! I don't know Paul will you? Why yes...yes I will! It's so interesting to know that I can not only talk to myself but have the questions ansnerd(this is meant to be spelled this way because of Rosie O'donnell) just like that! I can multi-task with myself! Ask and ansnerd my own questions! Woohoo! I could write a book today. I would entitle it: This is the book of what happens when you have nothing better to do than play thumb wars with yourself. Hey isn't that the nifty thrifty oodle caboodle noodle marshmallow pallow yallow armadallo idea! Some people with get this rhyming others will not! Don't worry it's in your best interest if you don't get it! Well I'm tired of typing so I'm gonna go! Bye bye to the turkey that got beaten and then eaten on Thanksgiving day! Save a turkey and eat vegetables! Paul

Oh my God Becky look at Constance's butt it is so big! You could set up camp on that ass!! Just joking! Sarah...sarah quiet contrary how does your garden grow! With silver bells and cockel shells and pretty maids all in a row. That's today's nursery rhyme! Is your garden highlighted Sarah? I am like really bored and I want to go home and go to bed but that just isn't an option at this point and time. I want to fly! I think I can I think I can! I'm taking off right now! Woohoo! I'm flying to Japan to see Angel! Oops I mean China! Oops I mean somewhere other than Asia World. Here's one for you Laura Hairball! Now I have a new entry for you to read! Here is a poem to Laura:

Ode to Laura

You are a monkey
Your butt is chunky.

You have blonde hair
Do you wear underwear?

You are kinda quirky
If you were my pet I'd name you turkey lurkey.

You want a suspended bed
Be carefuland watch your head.

You've become really nice
Please don't tell me you have lice.

I'd keep you in my closet
If there was a salad would you toss it?

This is just a joking poem
Nothing's meant be taken seriously! (Ha..ha..no rhyme)

Well I'll write later! Hope you like your poem Laura! See ya to a cheetah named Leah! Paul

I am really hungry and bored. What a bad combo right? Well Baby Girl is doing well. She goes with me almost everywhere! She went to the postoffice with me today. She is such a nice little rat! Anyway...so I've been thinking about the phrase "forgive and forget." Okay so I'm crazy but that's okay! If you can do that to someone else can you do that to yourself? Interesting question..huh? But whatever. I went to WalMart last night to buy veggies for BG and I. I got dip..she didn't! I figure it would cause her to get upset on her stomach...however I may be wrong. I got an 85 on my last test in English. However, my quiz grades are really sucking! I have not passed but like three of the eight quizzes! Bad ProB! He asks like these really weird questions that no one in their right mind would know unless they took a course on the story. But whateverah! I'm in a whateverah mood. So here is today's adventure which I haven't had an adventure in a while. So this girl brings in food and bedding for Baby G today. Well she forgets to tell me "hey it's been in the garage for like four days." Guess what I end up with in my cubicle? You guessed it weevils! These ugly little bugs that look like mini rhinos! Well needless to say I had about 500 of them crawling around my cubbie! They are all dead as far as I know because I had to play superhero Bug sprayer to the rescue man! EWWWW! I hate bugs! But anyway, I'll talk to you all later! Paul (I can't think of a rhyme today...my mind is rhymeless!)

What up my people? Guess what I have a new addition to my family. My new pet rat Baby Girl or Baby G. She is faboo! She is white with gray and black on her body. She is so adorable! She was with me all night long at Texaco and then we went home and she played in her home while I got a bath. She then proceeded to sleep on my shoulder for two hours. Everyone except for Angel loves her. She is a hoot. She tried to play cops and robbers last night and tried to break out of her jail/home. She was also playing trapeze artist swinging from the top of her cage. She is named after Aaliyah's nickname Baby Girl!! Well I will definitely be writing more about my adventures with Baby G. She is going to get a batterized Barbie Car for Christmas so that she can pimp around the house. Then when she is fully grown I am getting her a Barbie mansion. I call her my little Thugtress...hence the name Baby G! Talk to you all in a while crocodile!!!!! Paul

What up my people? It's just me Paul writing for the first time in a couple of days. So at work we had a Miss WV Pageant! I was voted to be the raining queen and had to dress in drag! It is not fun dressing as a woman. Has anyone ever told you that! It really sucks and your feet hurt really bad. I was the bomb though mustache and all! I was gorgeous. I ever went to English dressed like that and my friend Amanda dressed as a hooker and the ol' Professor Buff told me that I was beautiful! Imagine that! He is a horny little professor. I will never wear heels again because my feet are still hurting from two days ago. I need to have Dr. Schol's come and visit my poor broke ass feet and repair them so I can walk halfway decent. Work has been alright. Service levels were really bad today but hell Desi and I have gotten them to a managable status! Woohoo! Go Desi and Paul! Ms. Looney said that we rock...she is the bomb she has been up for like 17 hrs. or something doing physical inventory! Ms. Pat just yelled at me and told me that she doesn't have time for my nonsense! Whatever woman you do as I say! Just kidding I'm your elder! I won't work on your kitchen anymore woman! Just kidding times two! Well I've gotta go do some stuff later! Bye bye home fry to the big Mickey D's in the sky! Paul