Trying to add a picture...can't seem to get it to work! Help!!

I just found the coolest webpage for html learners

You see I now have colored font! Isn't that the coolest! I'm so proud...Here is the webpage with all the different codes...

http://hotwired.lycos.com/webmonkey/

Enjoy!!

Testing

Remind me again why you shouldn't get prescriptions filled at Wally World?

Because you will be there until Hell freezes over! I called my father's prescriptions in like 3 hrs before I went there and still had to wait and hour to get them. And at that they couldn't fulfill one of them. What the hell? I've come to believe that the people behind the counter are the ones with drug problems!

I'm totally groovin'....listening to music is the greatest! I'm chillin...tomorrow is the big 23 yr old b-day! So that I don't feel too old I'm listening to the lastest and greatest music! Oh...and dancing in the chair! It's almost like being at work...except there is really music playing...not just me singing in my seat and dancing!

Dolce and Gabbana may not be coming

So I got the email receipt for my purchase yesterday and the damn sandals were on there but they didn't have a quantity or a price. I don't think I'll be getting them...they say shipped as status but there is not charge for them. Hey I'll take a $400 pair of sandals for free if that's what they want me to do. That would be great. Is this considered stealing? Nah....I didn't think so!

Your body is a temple....so worship it...damnit!

So last night I was going to place and order for these Armani boxer briefs and a matching cotton/spandex blend top for $138.00! I'm so stupid. I figured that my body is a temple so I should worship it and give it what it wants. Well Armani wasn't exactly what I needed....I needed Dolce & Gabbana...DKNY...and Calvin Klein. I only spent $193.00 and got way more. I was supposed to go to Nordstroms today for their once a year sale...well that failed because it was only on women's and children's apparrell. The men's sale isn't until the 13th of June. So I went to www.solis.com !! It is great! Break it down:

2 pairs of CK's: $12.99 each instead of the Bonton's $25.00 each = a savings of $24.02 and sales tax.
DKNY Wallet: orginally $38.00...my price $18.99 = a savings of $19.01 and sales tax.
D & G Sandals: orginally $409.00...my price $149.00 = a savings of $260.00 and sales tax.

So I saved $303.03! See I'm a good spaver = shopper+saver!! And your probably like Paul you are such and idiot to pay that much for those sandals...I know...it was impluse and a credit card...what could I do! But they sandals are wonderful even though I haven't seen them in person yet!! But when you are using a interest free credit card for a year it's really not that bad!

I'm gonna own a pair of Dolce & Gabbana sandals! I can't believe it...this is my Annie moment...where I always thought it would be like Walmart shoes or Payless (which I still love)! I got treated not tricked...I got kissed not kicked...

April and I's list of midget porn that we made up!

1. We be munchin' midgets
2. Munchin' midget mania
3. Smidgin' midgets
4. We be pimpin' midgets
5. Ragu: Rich and Meaty Midgets (Inspired by a can of Ragu spaghetti sauce)
6. Mini Minute Midget Men (say that one like 3 times fast)
7. Midgets don't mate they masturbate...

Enjoy!!

Oh My God I've Gone Insane....Again

So it's not that I don't like water...it's just that when its been raining for the past 7 years that it starts to put a "dampen on your mood" (no pun intended). I know that dampen is probably not a word but who cares. I'm so bored I think that I'm going to go insane for real this time. Life right now is not all that it is cracked up to be...I mean it would be if you were supposed to:

A: Get out of bed
B: Go to the bathroom
C: Go back to your bed and watch t.v.
D: Eat and then possibly shit or piss
E: Go to sleep for the night

Doesn't that sound exciting guys? Aren't you just dying for that type of lifestyle? Me too! Oh no wait....I already have it! Lord what I wouldn't do for like some PCP or something to make me see things so that I could get away for awhile. I wouldn't really do it. You all know me way to well...(don't roll your eyes that's not polite). So anyway I'm getting off of here to do nothing for the 4th week in a row....

From your bored and almost psycho pal...

Paul

Why did I even stop writing?

I'm not finished yet. Guess what comes on the television tonight? The Golden Girls Reunion! Oh my what wonderfulness!! I'm too excited I think I may have to faint...shit let me get off this blog before I think of something else to write in a 10 min time span.

Well I've decided to edit instead of creating like 400 blogs today...it's now like 10:59am. Here is an interesting article from yahoo's oddly enough:

LONDON (Reuters) - Move over Spider-Man -- mere mortals may soon be coming to a ceiling near you.

Researchers at the University of Manchester say they have cracked the secret of one of the reptile world's greatest climbers, the gecko, and produced a sticky tape that can mimic the lizard's gravity-defying abilities. Soon, people could walk on walls like comic-book superhero Spider-Man, the university said.
"The new adhesive -- gecko tape -- contains billions of tiny plastic fibers which are similar to natural hairs covering the soles of geckos' feet," the University said in a statement. "The research team believes it won't be long before Spider-Man gloves become a reality." Bob Full of Berkeley University in the U.S., which was also involved, said the technology could be used for handling computer chips and could have applications in medicine. Plans are under way to produce larger pads and to improve the tape's durability, said the journal Nature Materials, which published the paper. But the University said cost was currently prohibitive. "We have considered producing a large amount of gecko tape, sufficient amounts to enable a student to hang out of the window of a tall building," it said. "However it would cost too much money, and would not benefit us scientifically."

Hello? I wonder if this tape would support me or any fat person? The shit people come up with...

It's lunch time...umm

What yummy in my tummy can I create today that is low calorie and follows weight watchers? Weird question number 5,265...Are the weight watchers watching their own weight and who the hell would want the job of watching weight? See I told ya...I'd be back...almost like I'm on crack...ain't it?

Chicken and Cheesy melt sandwich on Weight Watchers bread and some mo' shit...

That's what I had for lunch. It was low calorie and not that fattening. It was like 5 pts. Only 30 more to go.

So the question now is peroxide or hair dye? Do I want to go black hair with red tones (peroxide) or total black (dye)? I can't decide. I think I'll try the peroxide first and if I don't like it I can always use the dye I have...such decisions that I must make in one days time. Ha..ha..ha...I'm bored!

I just washed my blanket...God I love dryer sheets...they smell...perfu-riffic!

It's like 1:42pm and I've had an epiphany....maybe?

I've decided that the movie "The Rules of Attraction" could possibly be the most brilliant movie that I have ever seen...what the epiphany. I love it. Also there is a character named Paul Denton in the movie and that would be my name if my parents wouldn't have gotten married. How cool is that. I now have my real first name and my"parents unwed" last name in a movie. Basically it's my mother's maiden name plus my first name. Remember love children don't always wind up with the father's last name. I just happened to be lucky. I don't think they'll ever use my real last name. It's too blah and can be way over mis-pronounced. Until we meet a-gain! (<---like in "My Fair Lady").

It's about 3:00pm

Guess what? My hair is now medium to light brown....how exciting? But I must continue my quest for light light brown hair!

It's 6:10pm and this is the last entry...

I cooked...now my back is hurting and I don't even want to eat what I cooked. Isn't that the most fucky ducky thing!! Later going to lie down! Have a great night! And my hair is light brown!

I don't even think it's been a full mintue and I have a question?

Laura S. Do you still visit my blog? I was just wondering? Leave me a comment Butt Muffin!!

The computer is your friend...it loves you and wants to marry you!!

I have just spent the last 2 hrs. on www.ilovebacon.com !! This is sick. I'm obsessed with that damn site. Although when I got to the archive of a video with someone getting their tongue split in half I about puked! It was 59 seconds...I made it through like 20 seconds before actually realizing what the fuck was going on! It could quite possibly be the grossest thing I have everah everah seen in my life. Please if you go to the site do not watch the video. Who in the hell would want to have their tongue split in half. Ugh? (<----that sound Tim Allen used to say on Tool Time or whatever that show was called he was in).

So this brings me to the conclusion that my closest friend is the computer. Here are the reasons:

1. I like the computer, except for that tongue video so the computer is my friend who I spend lots of time with while I'm off work.
2. My computer loves me...it doesn't talk back it just takes me to places I enjoy...except for that tongue video. (And porn sites are excluded...dirrty dirrty minds.)
3. My computer keeps me engaged for hours and days at a time so the way I figure why not get married...I mean we are already engaged with one another. My computer can't do anything without me...and I can't find stuff without my computer...but I really wish I hadn't found that tongue video.

You know I have way to much time on my hands!! I guess it's better than snot!

Blogging ah go go

I've decided to blog throughout the day...because I figure that I think of something weird or interesting (at least to me) about every hour. So why not spend the day on a blogging extravaganza! All day blogging. This should be interesting. I'm getting something to drink...no food (diet...must starve oneself) and crashing in the basement for the day. After all the 78" or something like that TV is down here. TV and blogging...oh what joy!! I'm sure that I'll at least have a couple of more paragraphs to add today! Until then...bling bling on a swing swing oops the telly went ring ring!

1...2...3...and 4 why can't I fucking snore?

That is this morning's question. I went to bed at like 3am and have been up since 6:30am. Why damn it? Why me...Nancy Kerrigan? I feel the use of 28 cups of coffee should do me today...not do me but do me well in the waking process. I kept having muscle spasms in my side and my legs all night. I think about like every 20-25 minutes. They won't go away so now I'm up. They have ceased...of course...now that I've only had like a total at most with each waking up of 3 hrs of sleep. what the hell?

Last night I baked cookies with April and found out that men are like flowers according to her. I'm an exotic flower man...or just a bossy ass man bitch who is high maintenence. She told me I would be the one giving instructions in the household. Here was my example: "She bitch get in the damn kitchen and fix me somein' to eat! Now! I'm high maintenence and I'm famished so get to cookin." That sounds more Diva-licious to me. Hey I could live with being a Diva...as long as it can apply to men. April told me she is looking for a cactus...you only need to water them once a month at most and if you don't feel like watering them they'll survive.

So before I got to April's house it was raining and I'm all about the movie "Twister" for some strange reason. So I pretended that I was in the movie while driving. I started yelling "Look at all the rainbands this is going to be one big bessy....possibly an F4." Please tell me this is normal? Then I decided I was a goddess and changed the message on my phone to reflect the events that had just taken place in the car. (To me the God Paul doesn't sound as dramatic as the Goddess Paul). My message is something like...:"Hello you have reached the Goddess Paul I'm not available right now I'm hunting tornado's since I was thinking about the movie it's my new career...so I'll call you back if I survive the twistenator." I've really hit the jackpot on insanity with this stint. Call me crazy but that isn't your average message. Come on people have some creative minds when it comes to messages....step out of the "please leave me a message and I'll return your call" box. Head toward the light...Carrol Ann...because today is a new fucking day and it's bound to be fabulous.